The Case of the Extremes

I've noticed something recently that disconcerted me. I've been trying to find moderation in my life in everything for a some time. I believe moderation is the key to a happy, balanced life. But I've noticed that this very moderation of which I speak is close to non-existent in our Muslim community.

Now before you act surprised and go on the defensive about yourself, or the community as a whole, give me a chance to show you what I mean:

I've noticed that in the majority of the community, there are two kinds of people: the Zealous "Muslims" and the people who call themselves Muslim but never act that way (except maybe go to Salah, which has become a social engagement instead of a strictly prayer and learning session).

The Zealous "Muslims":
These people are the ones who spend all day in Al-madinah and truly try to be all about Islam. Unfortunately, these people are not as Muslim as they believe. They tell you to not to look at people from the opposite sex in a lustful way, yet when a cute boy or girl walks by, they are the first ones to look. They tell you that Allah is the judge, yet they pass judgement on every single other person who could possibly have "weaker" faith than they (yet there is no way to know that, because only Allah knows how much faith someone truly has). They say that they treat everyone as their Brother or Sister, yet if you are not hijabi (or have another Islamic fault), they ostracize you (whether or not that is done openly is another question. There's a difference between being ostracized subtly and being shunned openly). Before you tell me I'm just making conjectures, I can point out a situation in which I entered AlMadinah to pray at Zuhr time and I got the dirtiest stare from a hijabi girl sitting on the chairs in the corner next to the computers. I said "Salamu Alaikum" and she acted like she was surprised and mumbled a reply. How is that Islamic? Islam is so big on equality, so how can someone consider themselves pious if they make a snap judgement about someone from their appearance? It doesn't make any sense. Just because you have "halal fun" instead of partying doesn't make you better than anyone else.

The "Muslims":
These are the people who are born into Muslim families but don't understand what a gift that is. They are given the gift of Truth from the moment they are born, but they do not take advantage of it. Instead, they party like the Americans we live amongst; they drink; they don't pray; they don't fast (either they say they do, but don't, or they don't even put on a semblance that they do). These are the people you see and hear things about and you can't believe that they do. You are so innocent that a "Muslim" would have premarital sex, that a "Muslim" would get drunk, that a "Muslim" would have no kind of regard for modesty or reputation or anything thing that has to do with that (hayaa). These are also the girls AND guys who go around campus acting like they are Muslim, being involved in Muslim issues and clubs, yet they can be found making out with someone in a corner in the student union.

Where are the moderates? Where are the people who can admit that they do not act Muslim 100% but still understand what a gift being Muslim is? Where are the people who --gasp!-- wait for marriage? Where are the people who don't drink but don't act like they're better than those who do? Where are the people who don't pass judgement on others? Where are the people who pray but don't spend every waking moment in the mosque? Where are the people who recite "3aleyhi el salatu walsalam" when they hear Prophet Muhammad's name, peace be upon him, but don't throw out Hadith at you like daggers in every situation? Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, once said that we are a moderate people. My parents have been adamant about instilling this moderation in me and my brothers. If I can give them a quote to sum up their parenting, it would be that.
Is it our living condition that makes it impossible to float in the middle without being pulled one way or the other? If you try to hold onto your Islam, to survive in this country as a Muslim, do you have to cling to every doctrine with all your might? Do you become a "Muslim" if you're not a Zealous "Muslim"? I understand that everyone has to live their life the way they want, but I just don't understand why there's such a pull toward the extremes. Is it becoming the time to point out the "Goodies" from the "Baddies"? Have we come down to all or nothing? The chasm between the "Muslims" and the Zealous "Muslims" is widening every day. Why can't we meet somewhere in the middle (but not for drinks. Coffee, maybe)?
I know that there are some really good zealous Muslims out there who try not to pass judgement on others and who just believe in a pious life. And I know that there are some "Muslims" who are just lost and need to find their way or be guided by someone else. It just seems to me that there is such a wide gap that will continue to widen because of pride, misconceptions, pre-conceived judgements, and other things, that we will never meet in the middle. The ideal situation, I feel, and I could be wrong, is that we all go back to Islam's basics and follow them. It all started at the Pillars and people have lost sight of the basicness of Islam's perfection. Islam's not complicated, and the people who complicate it are losing sight of its Truth and the people who see Islam filtered through the eyes of the complicators are being pushed away from it, because they can't see its Truth either.
It just saddens me to see such a large fissure between the Muslims, especially in a time like this, where we need to be solidified more and more --and don't even get me started on sectarian issues.

DISCALAIMER: I just want readers to know that I understand that I am no where near a perfect Muslim to be passing judgement about how other people do their religion, but these are just my observations, unfiltered by my judgement of whether or not it will piss people off. This is just what I think and you can take it or leave it. Leave a comment at your convenience. If you are not a blogger member, email me if you want. -Ayah