Things never really change.
You thought this post was going to be about Israel, didn't you? Well, sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not gonna post a MILLIONTH post about the conflict. I'm going for something ever so slightly less important:
Recent events in my life have gotten me thinking about how we humans handle the issues we face and what those issues were. I've come to the realization that everything that happens to us in friendships and our emotional reactions to it are just overly dramatized playground problems.
I was thinking about making a list of all the childsplay problems and their adult counterparts, but I didn't think everyone could relate to the problems I was thinking about (problems that I can't help but think about, since they inspired this post). However, I can just mention some things: being left out, being made fun of, having things taken from you (people or things), et cetera.
Now, with the problems remaining the same, our reactions differ with our growth. When you're nine and some kids make fun of you at school, you cry right there, or you tell the teacher, or you run away and cry. Or else you say something lame like "Nah-uh! Your face!" As we progress, the people who make fun of us don't go away, but the way we react to them is different: you might decide to kick some ass, you might decide to walk away, and you even might decide to brush it off and tell yourself it's not that big of a deal. But in all parts of yourself, you can tell it had the same effect on you now as it did in 2nd grade. You still question yourself, you still want to go to your mom, and perhaps not cry, but maybe just tell her about it.
If you're left out of somethin, you won't feel any less upset, but instead of your friends being poopooheads, you are the one with something wrong with you. How come they didn't tell me? What's wrong with me that makes me less trustworthy than that person? And this comes after the initial anger that says "What the hell is the matter with these people's jugement that they would exclude me?" and you digress into "fine, I'll exclude them." And "Poopooheads" turns into things far worse and harder to take back. Maybe I'm just rambling here. Maybe this post doesn't make any sense without context. Maybe I have to explain what happened. But I won't.
Everyone can take this post to mean what they want it to mean. And if you want to apply it to Israel-Arab World, go right ahead, it's valid if you're not gonna be a stickler and say "oh it's way more complicated than that". The fact of the matter is, as complex as we think our problems are, they all boil down to one form or another of the basic problems we all face. And it's difficult to come to terms with that, because you feel that you're being childish and immature. But don't worry about it, you're not alone. Isn't there a child inside of us all?
Recent events in my life have gotten me thinking about how we humans handle the issues we face and what those issues were. I've come to the realization that everything that happens to us in friendships and our emotional reactions to it are just overly dramatized playground problems.
I was thinking about making a list of all the childsplay problems and their adult counterparts, but I didn't think everyone could relate to the problems I was thinking about (problems that I can't help but think about, since they inspired this post). However, I can just mention some things: being left out, being made fun of, having things taken from you (people or things), et cetera.
Now, with the problems remaining the same, our reactions differ with our growth. When you're nine and some kids make fun of you at school, you cry right there, or you tell the teacher, or you run away and cry. Or else you say something lame like "Nah-uh! Your face!" As we progress, the people who make fun of us don't go away, but the way we react to them is different: you might decide to kick some ass, you might decide to walk away, and you even might decide to brush it off and tell yourself it's not that big of a deal. But in all parts of yourself, you can tell it had the same effect on you now as it did in 2nd grade. You still question yourself, you still want to go to your mom, and perhaps not cry, but maybe just tell her about it.
If you're left out of somethin, you won't feel any less upset, but instead of your friends being poopooheads, you are the one with something wrong with you. How come they didn't tell me? What's wrong with me that makes me less trustworthy than that person? And this comes after the initial anger that says "What the hell is the matter with these people's jugement that they would exclude me?" and you digress into "fine, I'll exclude them." And "Poopooheads" turns into things far worse and harder to take back. Maybe I'm just rambling here. Maybe this post doesn't make any sense without context. Maybe I have to explain what happened. But I won't.
Everyone can take this post to mean what they want it to mean. And if you want to apply it to Israel-Arab World, go right ahead, it's valid if you're not gonna be a stickler and say "oh it's way more complicated than that". The fact of the matter is, as complex as we think our problems are, they all boil down to one form or another of the basic problems we all face. And it's difficult to come to terms with that, because you feel that you're being childish and immature. But don't worry about it, you're not alone. Isn't there a child inside of us all?
posted by Ayah @ 11:21 PM
3 Comments:
At 1:45 PM,
rima said…
same problem, different day
At 7:17 PM,
Samira said…
the thing about being in this dunya is that we're too helpless when we try to fly solo and still helpless, all over again, when we try to build and maintain relationships that need more work than we think we're cut out for...some genious catch 22. Caring for people--people who are as able to hurt as well as care for us more than they will ever be able to express--seems to be some burden we strange creatures almost seek.
maybe it's Allah's way of teaching us something, like realizing that we have to turn to him first--for everything. And it seems that turning to Allah doesn't make our problems vanish necessarily--it just gives us reason to try harder, more sincerely, and it makes our losses seem more palatable. maybe.
i'm relieved that we're trying to figure this kinda stuff out now. it's almost as though we're going through what the average person in our society would call "a mid-life crisis." maybe these frustrations will help us lead more mature lives when we're supposedly at "midlife." Allahu `A'lam.
At 2:55 PM,
Stephanie said…
i think every person is incapable of being entirely rational and mature simply because we are emotional beings who are limited by perspective.
my friend once told me that perspective is not truth, but i think, sadly, it IS truth for people. i mean, it's not always SAD.. it's just reality. take our conversation about faith last week.. i mean, i really do see where you're coming from and i am certain you can see what i'm trying to say, but because of our finite perspectives we are incapable of fully placing one another in each other's shoes.
this is why i passed the homeless woman on the street today without giving her the lunch i held in my hand. it's why wars are fought and marriages dissolve and crimes are committed. it's just that some people handle it better than others. namely the people who accept that their perspective is just a perspective and not some grand altruistic statement.
which, by the way, is my number one complaint about fellow Christians who miscontrue what the Bible teaches in order to use their own opinions about how life should work. in fact, it doesn't just go for Christians.. that's basically my big upset for everyone in the world who uses things that are supposed to be good for their own selfish desire to convert the world to THEIR perspective.
anyway, enough of my freaking out about immaturity. it's not very mature of me :-p
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